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Sometimes not just time helped us to move on. It’s also the reason why we want to. You’r actually giving me credit Amit, your turning me out as much as you want and it’s a good thing for me. It does hurt. Really bad. I can’t even express it.
But then again, somehow I’m learning the giving up method. Kesa naman umasa ako sa isang bagay na harap harapan ng ipinagkakait sa akin. As things with my life is happening with no proper direction, I accept loss and downfalls. Wala din naman akong magagawa.
My outlets today help me a lot. Maybe there I can also see the things and the wishes I’m looking for.
-raven
Gusto kung umiyak like I never cry my whole life, I want to shout until I run out of voice. I don’t know why I’m still holding unto this long, long drama of my not so fortunate love life. Hindi ko alam kung bakit hanggang ngayon sya parin ang gusto kung makita lage, sya parin ang wallpaper ng cellphone, ang picture sa study table, ang gusto kung isipin bago matulog.
You will never do the same to me right? Pero kahit na ganun, patuloy pa rin ako. I already felt too much pain, pain that once in my life I’ve never been experienced. Too much heartache which if I analyze properly, it’s so not worth it.
I’m still here, waiting and wishing…
Please, kung kelan man to matatapos, sana naman dumating ng maaga.
Gusto ko ring mag move on, gusto ko rin tumahimik na ang lintik kung utak sa kakaisip sayo.
Mahal kita… pero ayoko ng masaktan pa,.. paulit-ulit kasi.. wala akong pasensya sa ganitong mga bagay.
I want peace… Sana may vaccum para sa utak,.. :(
-raven
It’s just happening now, I’m just waiting for you. Because I love you Amitpal Singh Kukreja.
I don’t know if this is right but I really do.
I do.
I love you… and it hurts..
—raven
I just can’t believe how you change everything Amit. I never been like this. But with you? everything I’ve stored for my self was just like dust that was blown away,..
You can’t love me back.. but I can’t help my self from falling for you.
—raven
The time passes so fast, this event of my life which your currently involved is giving me so much time to think of. I never love or whatever it is called like this before. I never get my self into a situation which I have to keep on waiting, wishing for someone this hard. For me, if it is not meant to be.. then so be it! But everything change after you.
Sinisira ko na ba ang sarili kung paninindigan? At dahil lang sayo? Kailangan ko pa bang hintayin na sabihin mo na talaga na umalis na ako sa buhay mo? Do I have to risk for it?
But…. do I really love you?? do I?
I want answers… I mean.. I need answers!
-raven
“The best thing happen when I meet you?
I love again…. and I start risking for something I want to have…
But until now I’m not sure if it will end it good for me…
-raven
Somehow, I don’t know what he is really up to. Yesterday became the worst day with him, almost went to the point that I realy want to delete him on my ym. I dont know what happen, or what he really want. But why is he still having conversation with me? Why he still keep me on conversation.
And even if I know now that I’m just worthless to him, the game which I created for him seems to wake me up at kahit paano ay nagkakaroon naman ako ng mga reason para kontrahin ang mga nararamdaman ko. Siguro lang binibigyan ko ng panahon o pagkakataon ang mga bagay na nais kung mangyari. I’ll keep some distance for myself para na rin di ako masyado pang masaktan pag natapos na ito.
Yes, I still find him as special but I know it wont happen. Kahit sabihin pa nya na gusto nya akong pakasalan? And then saying it’s for pass time…. Masakit kaya, alangan namang ipagsiksikan ko sarili ko. Kung ganito naman talaga ang totoo, kaya kung panindigan kung ano man ang laro ko at laro nya. I always play with risk.. it’s how my life revolved. And whatever happen in the end? I choose it, I’ll regret but I wont ever change what I invest..
-raven
” i smile when i remember that the last conversation we had was the first time we don’t argue”
If ever ba na mahal na talaga kita, matatanggap ko na you can’t give it back to me?
haizt….
masyado ko lang talagang pinapalalim ang mga pangyayaring ito. If you can’t return me the favor,well, i take the risk anyway….
As long as your still there to have some conversation, a good or bad one, I know something is meant to be…
—raven
“Pang habang buhay ang pagibig ko sayo o sinta….”
even though I mean nothing to you, I keep on waiting for you… and then smile after you give a message..
I don’t know if something is wrong w/ me or my mind is just not working properly,.. hai! ewan ba… masyado ka yatang espesyal at naging ganito ako. Kahit kailan naman wala sa dictionary ko ang “baliwbaliwan dahil sa isang lalaki” sentence…
I want to accept and believe all your friend saying “you should not get into Ricky..he don’t know how to love any girl seriously…” But as I realize,. how about Dixita? you loved her a lot right? you loved her seriously… thats why your hurting now…
hmmmm… masyado ko na yatang pinalalalim to… ewan ko ba..
-raven
